Team of the Weak
State of Origin is all too often compared to war. But there is actually a quote amongst the American armed forces that seems rather apt after Wednesday night’s game; “All gave some, some gave all.”
Despite being appropriated by Billy Ray Cyrus for the title of his 1992 Achy-Breaky abomination of an album, it is still a fitting description of the Origin players’ efforts.
Eight players have ended up with injuries after a thrilling and eventful Game 1, meaning those of you who had to make do without the Origin stars last week, might have to wait a little longer before your squads return to full strength.
Which is a total pain in the butt for CEOs who were banking on Origin players backing up this weekend to fill out already skeleton squads due to another round of byes.
Hands up anyone who rushed to NRLCEO’s free list to see who might be available for Melbourne to replace Cooper Cronk? And then again when Cam Smith did his ankle. And by the time Billy Slater went down, you were wondering if it was worth having anyone at all from Melbourne, now their three most potent attacking weapons had been neutralised.
Then there were probably some of you who recruited Bulldog halves last week, that were secretly cheering on the inside when you saw Josh Reynolds dump Brent Tate on his troublesome neck. Tate’s neck is as fragile as Jamie Soward’s ego, and as thin as Beau Ryan’s comedy, and the fact that it miraculously stayed in tact is probably the reason that Josh got off so lightly at the judiciary.
Anyway, as we take a look at the NRL’s injury ward, here is an entire potential team we could construct with out-of-order players:
1. Billy Slater
2. Edrick Lee
3. Josh Morris
4. Timana Tahu
5. Matt Duffie
6. Aidan Sezer
7. Todd Carney
8. Andrew Fifita
9. Cam Smith
10. Anthony Tupou
11. Boyd Cordner
12. Glenn Stewart
13. Ashley Harrison
14. James Tedesco
15. Lachlan Coote
16. Gavin Cooper
17. Ben Henry
Under other circumstances, you’d be fairly stoked if you managed to draft this team. Unfortunately, injuries seem to be a bit of a blind spot of my future-telling abilities. Oh well…
Let’s press on regardless.
Panthers v Eels
If you’re Brad Arthur, do you play Jarryd Hayne and risk exhausting and injuring him, or do you rest him and risk losing the game?
If you’re Penrith, you’re cheering because either way, they should run out victorious. When Hayne is firing, so are the Eels. It shouldn’t take much to shut him down tonight, so Jamie Soward will have the run of things and put in his performance of the season. Unfortunately, he seems to be sharing the kicking duties, so his value is somewhat diminished, but he’ll set up several tries tonight.
If you have Eels and Panthers forwards, I suggest playing them, because several will rack up some workhorse tries.
Roosters v Raiders
Ok, I’m calling it now. Raiders will have a HUGE game this weekend. Despite playing away, they will take it to the Roosters Saturday night, and if they don’t win, they will push the Roosters to the limits.
The Roosters forwards will have to get through a mountain of work due to a lot of uncharacteristic mistakes that will let the Raiders right into the game. So as usual, you should play your Sydney pigs – even the bench forwards.
Jarrod Croker will score at least one try to go with a handful of goals, and I foresee one of the Raiders forwards flopping over for a four-pointer. Don’t ask me which.
Storm v Cowboys
Holy testicle Tuesday! Poor old Melbourne. Queensland’s 1,6,7, and 9 are arguably the best playmakers in Rugby League, and three of them were set to play the fourth, but now, the fourth has free reign against a very depleted Storm.
I’ve have always said that Craig Bellamy’s strength lies in having the best 1,6,7 and 9, who make the rest of the (rather average) squad perform better than they should. In this Ballboy’s opinion, many of Melbourne’s great forwards would not have been nearly as good if they played at another club.
This week will certainly test those forwards in the current team, and many of them will tackle themselves to a standstill. Play them.
The Cowboys will rack up a big tally, and their backs will score plenty. I will be surprised if any of the Cowboys forwards get their workhorse rates up this week.
Warriors v Knights
With the departure of Jerome ‘Throwa” Ropati, the Warriors will put in one of their rare inspired performances dedicated to one of fantasy football’s unsung heroes. Though with Shaun Johnson looking to be ruled out, it is unclear where the points will be coming from.
I can admit that I occasionally get stuff wrong. Occasionally.
But when I predicted at the start of the season that Newcastle would be one of the top contenders this year, I screwed up hard. Though in my defence, no one saw this Tinkler nonsense coming.
If anyone can right a wayward ship, it’s Wayne Bennett. So Knights fans can take some solace in the fact that he’s still at the helm.
Though, beware the animal backed into a corner. With the Knights sitting second last, they are running out of directions to go.
I predict this game will be boring as hell, but will be low-scoring and close. Look to the hookers to stand out.
Broncos v Sea Eagles
Manly have had a rotating roster for some time now and they currently sit second. So their latest line-up should cause few problems. Jamie Lyon returns this weekend, and he’ll also return to the scoreboard with at least one try and several goals.
Brisbane are struggling away from the field and this will translate onto the pitch when the Eagles stomp them. Seriously, the Broncos will be a complete cluster-fudge this week, and despite missing Cherry-Evans, the Sea Eagles will firm as premiership favourites.
I predict few workhorse tries in this match, save McCullough, and I predict Taufua and Hiku to score 4 tries between them.
Rabbitohs v Dragons
Hail Mary full of grace. Our team is with thee.
Blessed art thou among fans, and blessed is the game on the field.
Holy Mary, coacher of Dragons, who play for us sinners, now and at the hour of our victory.
Amen.
And such is the prayer of the Dragon Army. Many of which, who were very outspoken over coach Price, have gotten their wish, and now Paul ‘Mary’ McGregor has the reins for the rest of the season.
I predict the change of coach, and the extra time Benji has had with the team, will inject some life into the previously lifeless Dragons.
Does that mean they’ll beat the Rabbits? Probably not. But they’ll go a hell of a lot closer than in other efforts this year.
I predict Benji will be on fire, but Inglis will be a silent assassin and ultimately, St. George Illawarra’s undoing. There should be plenty of points on offer from both teams, but the Bunnies will get the money.
Joel Reddy will be the only weak link in the Rabbits’ backline, a backline who should run up the tally quite well.
Other than Benji, look to Widdop and Rein to provide the points for the Red V.
There it is gang. Be safe this weekend, who knows where injury will strike next!
The Crystal Ballboy
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